The Benefits of Higher Conscious Living

– I’m Dr. Michael Hayley, and this is the Dr. Hayley Show podcast.

Today, I’m hoping to empower the audience with a understanding of the things that are important in life and maybe with a sense of direction to achieve your goals and fulfill your purpose in life.

And to help do that, today’s guest, Dr. Ron Stotz, he’s a three times best-selling author. He’s a Doctor of Chiropractic, as a PhD in psychology, studied psychology and neurology and figured out how to apply these things to leadership, and he helps executives and entrepreneurs to find higher levels of conscious leadership. Dr. Stotz, thank you so much for joining us today.

– Well, thanks for having me, I appreciate it.

– Now, good morning to you. I know we’re in completely different time zones. I’m suspecting maybe you just had a chance to wake up and jump on with us.

– I’m doing my better.

– That’s awesome. Yeah, we’re three, three hours different, and it’s still early over here so I know it’s early for you.

– There you go.

– I love the fact that you’re a doctor of chiropractic, and I’m not practicing much myself anymore. I’m a doctor of chiropractic, but I have, I also a new mission in life. And with the work that I’m doing, I’m helping people in new ways, doing something that most people don’t have access to. And as a chiropractor, people would pass to a hundred chiropractors on their way to me. I suspect it’s the same for you now that there’s kind of a greater fulfillment and enjoyment and the things that you’re doing. Am I correct?

Well, you know, the truth is I had a PhD in psychology well before the chiropractic license and I really went back to get that. Find out more about the body and the nervous system because I was using brass and movement and different more physically oriented aspects of the work and so I went back as an education. I met my wife and some of the earlier classes and that’s probably why I stayed through the intro program but it really became a useful tool for me to have. I only practice straight prior practice for a couple of years. It gives me a better understanding of the body and nervous system that type of thing. I knew a lot about the neurological nervous system but I wanted to understand how it related into the whole physiological system.

I think you also took some principles home that were taught in chiropractic for instance we were taught to give for the sake of giving and all of our needs would kind of be met. I see you as that person that’s really there to help as many people in life as possible. It seems that you give a lot of it away and then you know those that are supposed to be customers or clients financially for you. That just is something that just happens naturally because of who you are and what you do. A good example of that was something I just downloaded. It’s a nine insightful question and that got my interest and I dug into it a little bit. I thought man, those are some real thought provoking questions that can help anyone and I didn’t have to pay you for that.

No, thank you. No, I really do want to, you know, educate in and reach you now. My little mission that I really motivates me to go through the world is really to try and make it a more conscious and caring world. And doing that for all the kids that are coming up just make it a better place for everybody.

Before jumping into the leadership, I want to understand a little bit more about your do-on plant medicine and peak performance, which is probably more of the chiropractic perspective. How do you apply those things in your life?

Well, I’ve gone through a lot of my own journey and so what I’ve really accumulated are the most effective tools that I can use for various situations that I run into, not only my own life initially, but working with others. What I look for in leadership really comes down to leading what I would call a mindful life. In other words, your higher-level leaders are really nothing more than consciously, it’s more conscious than other people. They’re just more aware of what they’re thinking, what they’re feeling emotionally or physically. They’re more aware of what level of awareness I am, am I in it this particular moment, you know, as I’m responding in this particular situation.

And so when you look at their lives, they’ve gone through a lot. They’ve done a lot of inner work. They’ve done a lot of trying to understand themselves becoming more self-aware, if you’re well. And that self-awareness, of course, then extends into awareness of others and organizations and beyond. And so the tools that I use are initially trying to help them neurologically roar and wire their brain for full integrated brain access. But to really refine that, then it gets more into mindfulness. How do you not necessarily just meditation or things that we think of as mindfulness tools? But how do you really shift everything that you’re doing like? You’re relationships, you’re eating, you’re walking, you’re all of that.

And if you play golf, whatever you do, how do you turn that into a mindfulness exercise? So you’re living mindfully. And the other real key components that I see for the highest level leaders are they invite them into their life, regular significant personal transformation experiences. Now that can mean a lot of things, but it could be somebody died in your family. Somebody was born into your family. Somebody, you know, can be a natural occurrence that’s just going on. But there’s also those where have you really taken a moment to look deeper into your life to really step out of the normal flow and say, okay, today this week, whatever might be, I’m going to really experience different level of consciousness.

And that’s where the plant medicines can come in, especially in the work. By the time they’ve done my initial work, they had this really in-depth foundation for self-awareness and emotional intelligence and all of that. And so when they are in the more advanced work, they’re really capable of going on an inner journey, where they’re really, they’ve learned to breathe, they’ve learned to breathe into and accept in the floor and heal, whatever they come into. They’ve done a great job in their life and they get up to this particular level of consciousness, the plant medicine kind of takes them to another level. And so I’m always looking to introduce them to that next level of consciousness through what I’m sharing with experiences are having, not type of thing.

Yeah, we often teach our patients our following that when it comes to the foods you eat, they have a tremendous impact on how your body and how your mind works. If you keep a diet log, which is three columns, there’s a time and dates stamp, there’s a what you ate and there’s a how you feel. But the how you feel, it’s not just about digestion, but it’s about clarity of mind, your thought processes, are you able to receive the things that you’re hearing? Do you understand or are you foggy and unable to follow the conversation? So I can understand why that would be so important to have a healthy, nutritious diet.

Now, for some people in doing this, they might consume animal foods and have better clarity than some plant foods. Not all plant foods are healthy, wheat, grain, and flammatory foods. But even in the case of animal foods, when the animals are consuming the plant foods, then those nutrients are in them that way. But the point being is figuring out your nutrition, your plan, your exercise routines, the things for that optimal performance, certainly plays a role in the consciousness. So I get it, it makes sense.

Very much so. That was very much, you know, it was a serious meditator from very early on and probably had 30,000 hours of meditation and by my time I was hitting late 30s and 40s. I quit eating poultry or meat, and it goes about 21, when I let go of that because I could actually feel the different energy shifts that would take place in my being, you know, through or as a result of the food and so I just started eating much more consciously, you know, just being recognizing, well, what am I putting in my mouth? Why sit for meditation for hours or to be in a particular level of consciousness that you’re going to have an anchor that’s due to food or some element in your life that’s holding your back and yeah, that might definitely be the supporter of that.

When we talk about consciousness and then conscious leadership, how do you bring those together? What is conscious leadership?

Conscious leadership really, I had worked with Conscious leaders and I’d worked with owners of NFL teams or they might have own a hotel chain, a national hotel chain or something. You know, so I certainly worked with high-level leaders in my practice, but it wasn’t a focus on just that particular type of person. But about 10-plus years ago, my publisher really recommended that I consider that. And she really was sharing with me that unique talent, I have quite a few abilities, but my unique talent is really taking people into that highest level of consciousness, at highest level of leadership. And you know, when you read all the leadership books say, they have it delineated into different levels of leadership.

But they all acknowledge that, well, they know how to move them up a management into more advanced leadership. They literally don’t know how to take them into that highest level of leadership. They know the characteristics say understand where they’re coming from, but they don’t know how to facilitate people moving into that. And that happens to be exactly what I’ve been doing for 45 years and continue to do now with a more greater focus on leaders. Okay.

How can you tell when someone has reached that highest form of conscious leadership?

Well, it comes out in all, I mean, you’re watching as a shift as they become more self-aware, they become more aware of others, they become more emotionally intelligent, they become more considered in itself and kinder to themselves and kinder to others. I have the privilege of watching them evolve within their organizations, existing organizations, oftentimes. And then you just watch them really making that organization a more trusting, safe, supportive place. That’s really bringing out the best in everybody. In other words, your high-level leader is really doing nothing more than bringing out leadership within everybody else.

And the irony of that is instead of having to do more, they end up having, you know, being able to do less and focus on key projects and end up actually making more money because they’re not just micro-managing and, you know, everybody else. And so you end up with an organization that really fully respond into their mission, really repealing like they’re part of something that they’re a valued member of something. And they really end up giving their all. And of course, that radiates into their family and into the world and makes everything a better place for everybody.

As you talk about the relationships and the awareness of the other people around you and your family relationships, is that what you mean by emotional intelligence or is it more to that?

Well, emotional intelligence, I mean, my initial work is really helping them explore where they come from. And that always runs into as their childhood and that runs into their parents and that runs into their program for getting love and looking outside of themself for everything rather than within where most of the answers are need, really are. And so emotional intelligence, I mean, it really is a matter of becoming more emotionally aware. I mean, most people kind of have certain emotions that they kind of shove down into their gut and hide in their cave. You know, one of my mentors was Joseph Campbell and he talks about that cave within.

Well, those, any emotions that we felt as a child were acceptable in our family or in our community. We shoved them away or diminished them in whatever way we could. To end up with a lot of emotion, backlog, anger, and hurt, and fear, and shame, and those types of things, that as a child, we didn’t know how to process. So we quit breathing and shoved the man there there. We didn’t feel like they were acceptable to others. And of course, and by the time we’re in adults, we’ve got a good village being a emotional backlog that really consumes most of our subconscious thought. We’ve lost control of our life, because our definition of control is really not breathing and making sure we’ve contained all that emotional backlog, rather than breathing and being fully in our power and opening up our heart in mind.

So, do we need to go to a psychiatrist, you know, heal the past traumas or how do you deal with that?

Well, I do find that all of our issues are created in relationship to other people. And so they need to be healed in relationship to other people. And I am that first other person that they can really do that way. And it’d be done in relationship as a couple, you know, yeah. I used to do a couple therapy for years, back long time ago. And once you helped us, each of them really deal with their emotional backlog, get clear enough. Then they really as a couple begin to live a more conscious life and support each other and ongoingly. Healing. And so it’s kind of a combination. I don’t think, well, I know for a fact that we can’t do it on a round, because we’re just in the blind spot. You know, we, you know, I was talking to a person the other day and asked me, can’t we just do it on our own? I said, well, take a breath, take another breath.

I came down, take several breaths. And then I started having her complete certain sentences. Like, if I love myself unconditionally, I’m afraid other people will. Well, what, you know, when she started exploring, well, they’ll think I’m Erick after they’ll think I’m, you know, this or that or the other thing. And she got to the same place everybody gets it. I’m afraid other people won’t like me. I’m just a little child and I’m all alone and nobody loves me. I’m going to die. So people are running around with that poor belief system in there. If I’m in my power, if I’m loving myself unconditionally, I’ll die. So of course, they’re never going to make that choice to let them self unconditionally.

They’re never going to be in their power. As long as that subconscious beliefs is running their life. So they’ve got to heal that. They’ve got to become aware of that. To heal that. And really, repair that little child inside so that they become a whole integrated person authentic and self-acceptant love.

And what I’m hearing is people are doing a good job at hiding their traumas, not revealing them. So there’s a guided process to uncover the things that they’ve buried so well.

I mean, most people would do anything in the world to not open that cave up and let anybody in themselves or anybody else see what’s in there. And unfortunately, that keeps them in a limiting comfort zone that ends up killing. Every time a child has a feeling that they don’t know how to process. And there isn’t somebody there to force them in that process. They quit breathing and showed that emotion away. So a lot of times when clients come to me, they’re in their 40s, 50s, 60s, and their experts that not breathing and going up into their head so that they don’t have to deal with all those emotional feelings that they might be having.

And so, you know, you’re a chiropractor, you know that breathing is somewhat of an emotional aspect of health. And you know, when somebody’s not breathing, they’re triggering their nervous system, you know, fight or flight system all the time. And that really shuts off the chemical gates into their higher level of thinking, but some, you know, their digestive system is going to be after. Hard going to be stressed that, you know, the whole body is really under stress because it’s going on and on and on. And so you have to really heal that, to be healthy, to be truly healthy. You have to heal your emotional backlog so that you can breathe, so then you can be more emotionally aware and begin to actually maintain a lifestyle that supports you and being healthy.

Yeah, it’s funny because even people that aren’t doctors when they see someone in stress, they say, take a breath. Yeah, everybody intuitively knows that. So there must be even a recognition that you’re not breathing. Take a breath. How does that translate into breathing into success?

Breathing into success is really, you know, for me breathing is everything. I mean, it really is. It’s my guide. It’s my spiritual teacher. It’s my trusted friend. You know, I know that if I’m breathing, I’m more present unconscious. If I’m breathing in curious, then I’m going to really see what my best next options are and make the best choices in my life. If I’m breathing in curious, and I’m present, and if I’m breathing in curious and present, then I’m living mindfully. And if I’m living mindfully, then I’m really doing the best I can with whatever life is bringing me. And making my choices consciously and responding properly, or not it properly and just to supportively. So I’m really, you know, I call that, you know, how do you be responsible? You’re spawned appropriately in all levels to whatever is coming into your life. And you can only do that from a very present and conscious play.

It’s interesting as you’re saying those things, I have more awareness of my own breath. And yes, I feel present in the moment, understanding and receiving and realizing this is not something I’ve ever practiced. And I should. I think that did when I hear how many hours of meditation you’ve done and how much time you’ve dedicated to this.

It’s good. People who I’ve worked with 20, 30 years ago, you know, even more, come, you know, I’ll get emails or whatever and do something touching based with me. And they’re always commenting about how the breath has changed their lives and even their children’s lives. And so it becomes a central component to really living consciously and enjoying your life fully.

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What’s the difference between a coach and a mentor?

To think a coach classic tradition, you think of a coach, you know, in an athletic environment, and they’re kind of guiding and supporting and pointing out what you’re going to do better. You know, a mentor is going to be looking a little deeper. They’re going to be, you know, supporting you and being a bit more introspective and looking at what the motivation behind. You know, a coach might say, “Frain and get you all excited and push,” or a mentor is going to look what’s behind. You’re not pushing yourself for reaching for your back.

You know, so, you know, being an executive coach is, I think that’s more of just an adopted title, because that’s a comfortable name for, you know, the people that I’m working with. Some people, after they’ve worked with me for a while, they think of it, I think, embarrassing, but they, I think they look at me more of a spiritual teacher than they do. And executive coach, and I certainly don’t claim that title by any strategy.

Oh, well, there’s just obviously some spiritual coaching, some coaching, some mentorship, some spiritual guidance. I guess it’s all kind of intertwined in one way or another. You’ve had some mentors along the way, though, and you mentioned one or not familiar with. But I am curious, what are some of the things that maybe you learned from your mentors that had an impact on your life that you can think of clearly today?

Joseph Campbell, he did the whole hero journey, the whole Star Wars thing is based on Joseph work. And so he really talked about that cave with Anne. He’s famous for his photo, you know, you’ve got to go to that. We’ll never say it correctly. But you have to go to that. Open that cave within to find the treasure that you seek. And of course, that treasure that you’re seeking that everybody wants is out unconditional love that they wanted as a child. They’re always still seeking that even as an adult. And the only place you’re confining that is within yourself. And, you know, it’s through healing that emotional past, it’s through self-accepting all the different parts of yourself. So you become whole. So Joseph certainly affected that because that’s really the core of everything that I do, you know, validated that truth many, many times.

Buckminster Fuller, he’s fellow created the geodesic dome quite as quite a thought later back in the ’70s and ’80s I think it was. And I remember being on stage with him and just helping him with, you know, large audience in front of us. I was 27, he was 87, so as much more aware of, you know, the audience. And he was, you know, in terms of content, you know, concerns. And he was talking and all of a sudden he stopped and he kind of looked out and he just sort of held that posture for an extended period of time, you know, for the 27-year-old kid next to him, he’s going like, “Hello, man, let’s go a while here.” There’s a little 200 people out there waiting for you to say something, “Let’s go.” And that evening, we’re having some hot chocolate in front of the fire and they was bold enough to go, “Bucky, what was going on there?” Because, “Oh, I was just accessing information.”

And I was like, “What?” You know, 27-9-9-9. But he was very interested in my meditation at the time, which I was fully into. And he said, “So, you’re really good at stopping thought.” When you get to that place where you can stop thought, you can also extend out and request information. You can not really from something else, but from all of who and to what you truly are. And I call that accessing big nine. And that’s really what I end up introducing people to and the more advanced work. Because it’s a advanced later, high conscious later.

You really have to have a mind that’s so agile that I can deal with all the complexities and depths of rapid change that’s going on in the business world today. And so you can’t really be going okay well what did we do five years ago? What should we do and what did other people do? Or you have to really be present enough to access the best of who and what you are. And that’s big mind. In other words, really, really trusting that by going up in your head and trying to figure out the answer is not going to give you the best of what’s available by letting go and just putting it out there what you need and watching it come in.

And I do it all the time in my work and I have a little side gig that I don’t do much anymore, but I love to build Japanese gardens. And so you know it’s a matter of remember this one fellow at the CEO in San Francisco that I was working with found out I did that and he wanted me to build one for his wife. This was during the dot com period and you know so everything had to be bigger, better, more money that type of thing. And so he wanted this million dollar garden and I was like you know I’m running my practice and I’m working with the main certain of time, but you know there extensive drawings and all of that.

So I went up and then you know hill behind my house in Velvali and just sat and went into a quiet place and put out there. Yes, I want to create this Japanese garden. It’s for these people and I want to impact their lives in a way that allows them to be more conscious and loving. And so I sat there and I just watched this beautiful image of this garden command you know initially with the big waterfall and large pond and bamboo forest and all of these different components coming in.

But then even then minute details of the wind blowing rain and the sounds and the movement and the smells and within an hour and a half it was the most beautiful garden I’ve ever seen was there and three months later I built it and we went on sorts of international awards and for design and technology and you know I couldn’t have done that you know we didn’t have time to be running around making drawings and that I never did make any drawings and just like them through the space and drew it in their mind as I described it’s

pretty interesting because it flies in the face of the things I’ve been taught you know you have to document and plan and and write down your goals and have everything but you sat and you created a picture and you made it a complete picture so what else is there when that picture is complete making it a reality and then you just got to work to get it done skipping all the drawings that’s interesting

you know a client who’s got five nine figure business very successful guy one of his companies is modular homes and he wanted to be able to deliver them on a truck and so he needed a hinge you know to be able to open and close these two sections together and you know and he’s not an engineer he’s you know creative guy and really bright but you know so all he did was do that he just sat quietly and imagine the hinge that he needed and well in a half hour did come through and he drew it out and you know it was really a brilliant hinge I’ve never seen anything like it before in my life and I’m pretty you know aware of what’s going on out there and mechanical things and you know so people use it in a lot of different ways you know business decisions practical design answers to how to deal with particular situations maybe with employees or whatever and yeah it just that answer comes in that going to be optimal for everybody and

well next week back to you could really apply to anything from how I want my relationship with my wife and my children to be and you know what I want to see my business evolved into I mean it’s endless taking the moment to get quiet and create that image.

Now to imagine doing it any other way you’re just limiting yourself if you’re trying an efforting you know if you’re doing a math problem that’s one thing but you know if you don’t say you’re doing a math problem and you know you don’t know the answer you can still dig my big-minded answer and there’s a good chance it’ll be right and people love to play with that one.

The other thing that I thought was really neat was the example you had given where the speaker had paused and maybe it was awkward and I’m accessing what could be the most important thing to benefit the audience. It’d be nothing wrong with that. It would be worth the weight. And that pause can even create more impact with what’s going to be more present and listening more carefully when you do speak. It’s interesting I like it because we think that we have to just keep on moving along and entertain everybody. So I like that. I know I’ve done that in seeing patients. I just don’t have the answer yet, but give me a moment here. And then you know, I have a question for you and you start leading down a path and it’s like, “Okay, now we’re getting somewhere.”

And I do a my clients, you know, I see most of them in person, but I also do the gym chats with them. And I think most of the time, all I’m really doing is giving them a bigger perspective or a higher, more conscious perspective on whatever they’re challenged by. And that comes big mind. I don’t, you know, I don’t think about it.

You know, the other day, that’s not true. The other day, I plan was really dealing with some odd reactions in his work environment and he just thinks what working for him. And so I just took a moment. I said, “Just give me a moment.” I’m not that I don’t know what to say or how to say it. I just need to, and I just all of a sudden this question came to me. And it was the perfect question, you know, why don’t you want to grow up? In of course, he just went. That’s like hitting like a bull. I mean, this is a 57-year-old guy. But he saw the, oh, underneath it all, that little boy is still, you know, looking for attention. And that’s really what was being played out in this work. Yeah, immediately gave him the wherewithal to be able to look at it and heal it and move forward. Okay. Yeah, very empowering stuff.

And I thought you were going a different direction with it, because when I have a problem or a challenge, I always like to say, “What can I learn from this?” And how can I do it better or prevent that in the future? So I thought you were going more in that direction. Why don’t you want to grow up? Why don’t you want to learn it from this? But you were going back to him covering something up.

Yeah, in that particular case. And I think your direction is just as viable. Because the situation didn’t go that way.

But that’s just as viable to, you know, what’s looking at going and moving forward, and that’s you say.

What’s your favorite story or testimonial from someone that you’ve been able to, you know, take them to the next level of higher consciousness. And it was life transforming for them. I’m sure it is every time for everyone. But what’s one of your favorite stories?

I’m somewhat of a transformational coach. So a transformational guy that I would call it. Just before COVID that fellow came to me and very successful guy. The woman he had, his love of his life, had recommended. I had worked with her a few years before that. Then she had recommended it to come to me and they had lit up. And so with COVID and everything else, he was really in it and felt like his whole life was falling apart. And it potentially was, the kept going, the reaction that he was going in. And I ended up on Leland up by Seattle. And he came up and rented a cabin on the island and we did all the COVID prevention stuff for a couple of weeks.

And then he wasn’t seen anybody else. And I certainly wasn’t. So we were getting together a couple times a week. And you know, this guy went from, I think his first question to me was, “And what’s this love stuff? I don’t love myself, and I’m doing fine.” I mean, I was like, “Oh God, a way in the wrong room?” Yeah. But I found him within a month having fallen in love with himself. Restructuring his organization, his leadership within the organization. And I mean, within a year, he had more doubled the value of several of his organizations in either high value. And within a few months, his relationship was back together. And they were getting married. And they, “Wow, that’s the embarrassing.”

And his relationship with his family, his kids, not type of thing, which he had never mentioned. You know, it was all sudden shifting dramatically and getting better and better. And so, you know, just everything in his life got better. You know, he sent me quite a few of his sea-sweets and they really all did quite well with the work and they began taking over the organizations, the multiple organizations. And so, he ended up really not even bothering most of these people running in its organizations, where they would have been talking to him every day, you know, he ended up, you know, sometimes months would go by before they, you know, talked to him again.

But he started working on one aspect of one of his organizations that he was really passionate about. And of course, this is a very smart, creative guy. That one little tiny part of that one business that would have been, you know, not even considered before became the most valuable part and he’s going to make more money when that then he, well with any and all of everything else he’s doing. And that’s all the research shows that these people who become more conscious leaders end up making more money, being organizations are much more productive and much more profitable. And that makes sense because they’re in alignment with their life and they’re hiring intention.

They bring all their people in alignment with their own lives and organizations intention. And on Sunday you have all the energy moving towards that aspiration, that higher intention of the people involved. And of course that’s going to result in greater success.

I guess some questions because you mentioned it a couple times the word love, you know, vitamin L as it applies to loving yourself. I’ve never heard it phrase the way you just did where you said he ended up all in love with himself. You also use the word unconditional love as opposed to, well, there’s love and there’s unconditional love. What’s unconditional love as opposed to just loving yourself? I’ve always saw it as a almost like a conscious decision is unconditional love. Despite these things, I still choose to love and care for or be generous to or whatever the case is. But in that, you’re not actually balling in love. Help me understand because it seems to be an important key.

I’ve been a parent. I’ve got grandchildren and I’m sorry. I get to watch the age that’s go through. Parents always say, “Oh, I love my child and conditional.” Well, not really. Because if you don’t love yourself unconditionally, you’re not able to get one conditional. You watch most parents and they’re training their child with the best of intentions most times. To be the person they feel like they need to be to make it in the world and to be successful and to take care of themselves.

The truth is that that love is very unconditional. Say you dad doesn’t like, you know, as a kid when I was growing up, boys weren’t supposed to be afraid. In my family, we weren’t supposed to show anger. So here I am. I must have been in my late 20s before I ran into the reality of, “Oh, I don’t know how to show anger or fear.” And those were huge components that I would then buried in my life and were holding me back because I wasn’t connected to them. Did my parents love me? Did other greatest parents I could have had?

Did they love me unconditionally? No, they didn’t know how. They wouldn’t have even known how to love themselves unconditionally. They didn’t wear tape and love it. They had difficult childhoods. And you know, they were still in, you know, about the time they had me. They were still kids and, and lots of ways. And so when you really look at the child who once unconditional love more than anything else, what they’re looking for, they’ll do what anything they need to to get that. And they’re looking to their parents of like, well, what do I need to be? What do I do with these families? Are those families? What do I do in terms of self-reflection or whatever? The parents really mold the children to become the most lovable person they can for the parents. I’m working with people all over the world, India, and Africa.

And those parents have, you’ve got to give an education, you’ve got to do this. You’ve got to be like this. And so the children are like, “Okay, my fed into your mold, but now in their 40s they’re going, “Well, y’all, but who am I?” And so loving yourself on conditionally, really comes as a result of going into and healing that inner child. And really all those disparate parts that you’re discarded to be accepted and loved by your parents, family, and others. You nurture your relationship with them, you reconnect with them, you really learn to accept and love all of them.

Even those parts that you’ve jumped so far in there that you hope nobody would ever see it because you felt wasn’t acceptable to yourself and to others. You’ve got to go in there and learn to accept all aspects of yourself. That’s the journey of becoming whole. That’s the journey of accepting and loving yourself. And at some point, you graduated to a point where at least the most significant points, they’re aspects of yourself, have been reintegrated in your part of who you are. You know, I can be a very silly little boy whenever I wish. Asked my wife, but I can also be a very spiritual band. I can also be a drop guy.

I can also, I can be all of these different parts of who and what I am. And with now, you know, I’m not worried about what other people think. Because I’m not looking outside of myself and in longer for that unconditional love I want. I’m looking within and accepting loving myself. That’s the difference. That’s a whole different life.

Yeah and that final summary of that really makes a lot of sense to me. It brings a lot of clarity. Yeah, thank you. Thank you. What’s your day look like today? What are you going to do to love yourself?

Well, I’m already doing it in lots of ways to be honest with you. You know, I get up and get all cleaned up and I, you know, I take care of myself. I’m going to have a, having a breakfast jet and so I’m going to have a nice breakfast that I really enjoy and I’m going to have a conversation with my wife about something we always do in the morning and what third day life. What am I doing? I’m going to hit a bucket of golf balls into a net that I have in the yard and just hone my game or minefully and probably going to work in the yard a little bit. I go for a walk with my wife or doing some little project in the yard that I enjoy.

But most of the day is my working with clients on video chat today and on video zoom today and and that to me, you know, at this point I certainly in a lot of people say, I’m not sure retired yet and it’s like I don’t have any plans to retire. Absolutely, love what I do. And you know, so it’s a privilege to get talking to you about this. It’s a privilege to get to talk with my clients and you know, when you’re not just giving people information but you’re really helping them through their transformation. There’s nothing for me anyway, there’s more rewarding than doing. I’m giving the best of who and what I am and I’m living as consciously as I can and that’s my true.

It was neat as you answered that question on all points. There was a joy and a smile as you said those things that you’re going to do that you enjoy doing. So that’s beautiful and there’s a lesson in that. Do what you love. That’s part of loving yourself. I know the answer to this question where can people go to find out more about you and to make it really easy. There’s going to be link below the video on the YouTube page on the blog post. I want to especially link to this questionnaire. I’m going to put a specific link to the nine insightful questions because I really think that it’s a great starting point for anyone to really think about where they are, where they want to be and how they’re going to get there.

Exactly. That’s just it begins that in return. When they start asking questions, if you’re breathing and asking questions, you’re going to be in the training and the day for you want to go, that’s where people come and go, okay, I’m ready to go deeper and I need some health and I’m going to go, right? Let’s go, that’s the one’s the talk to me. They’re welcome and they can schedule a call and we can chat about whatever they’re working on and going through.

Man, what joy for me to spend time with you today? I’m seriously, thank you. Love and appreciate you, you are awesome.

I appreciate that, appreciate what you’re doing out there.